Do First Impressions Count?

How well can we know something or someone from a first impression?

First impression counts - to some, it is everything that matters. However, to what extent would we ever want to base our judgement, a final one at that, based on a one-time encounter with a complete stranger? How prepared are we, whether by chance or arranged, at any given moment when a part of our experience in life can be altered solely by a one-time call made by another?

A job interview. A first date. A business meeting. A blind date. Meeting the parents. A greeting at a restaurant.

As life is about learning new experiences, whether they be positive or negative, can we ever be truly prepared for someone to potentially alter the course of a path in which we can end up? How well should we trust our first instinct? Could first impressions actually be used as an excuse for us to discount what we do not want to face?

I am a believer of gut-feeling. And sometimes I second-guess myself once I make a snap judgement on something or someone, based on a first encounter. I would attribute a characteristic, for example, to something negative I have experienced in the past, hence would simultaneously conclude a negative association. Perhaps I am actually not ready to face such potential non-existent issue, thus opt to avoid the entire thing and attribute 'gut-feel' instead as a valid reason for my reaction and decision. I would often ask if such a conclusion would be fair towards the recipient, and often times, I do not want to know the real answer and choose to believe it instead. Some call it 'intuition', some call it 'sign'.

Whatever it is, I ask myself the same question: is it fair?

With all due respect

In our society, there is a silent understanding amongst people, that you need to be mindful in your actions, because even if you think it's just about you, it touches at least another.

Take managing people, for example. If you are a people manager, at least 50% of your time will (have to) be spent on people issues, whether it be professional or personal. The tough part comes when your management style and your own manager's are different. It is then when both of you would have to respect each other's, because there is no right and only one way of managing: it can work for some, but not others; it can drive some crazy, or drive the objective home; it can be motivating, or discouraging. In the end, it's about both parties 'managing' each other, and respecting how each goes about accomplishing tasks or overcoming issues, and that they do not have to agree on the how.

The sticky part can come when one or both does not realise the line between who begins and who ends: the overlap. Not only can it send a confusing message for the other people who might also be involved or caught in the cross-fire, it creates easily avoidable conflict should one have identified the roles and objectives of each from the very beginning.

1. Never assume the other person knows what you're thinking.
2. There is no such thing as too much clarification.
3. Not everyone has the same way of communicating nor does everyone solve problems the way you do.

Everybody grew up in different environments, surrounded by people who have influenced them in ways others might have never been influenced.

Remember that.

Personal or professional.

A day in the life of

She is sleeping. Peacefully, quietly, human-like.
Tired, I reckon, after having gone for a four-hour hike all day in the rain. Not just any rain, Canada northwest-coast rain that broke records. Figured after a long, dry summer without, the sky came back with a revenge the past couple of weeks. My pristine, light-coloured couch, acquired before all this rain and Macy were ever paired together in my life, suddenly in danger.

Breathing, turning.

She is always sleeping by the time I get home, reminding me how to enjoy the little things in life, speak out when there is uncertainty, eat when it is time, walk around endlessly until you find that perfect spot to settle yourself down.